An elderly woman wants half a head of lettuce at a grocery store, so she tells the young man at the checkout,

“I would like to buy half a head of lettuce.”

The young man says, “I’m sorry we only sell whole heads of lettuce.”

The old woman says, “Well you see I’m old, and I don’t eat very much, and so when I buy a whole head of lettuce, the other half usually goes to waste. Would you ask your supervisor if there is something he could do?”

The young man, rolls his eyes, lets out a sigh, and walks into his supervisors office.

“Hey, some dumb old hag wants to buy half a head of lettuce…”

His supervisor looks up from his desk and is shocked to see the elderly woman had followed the young man.

She’s right behind him at the door and heard what he said.

The young man turns around, sees her, realizing his mistake blurts out,

“But this beautiful young lady would like to buy the other half of that head of lettuce, so it works out, right?” Everything is worked out, the elderly woman leaves happily, and the supervisor says,

“That was close. You’re pretty quick on your feet. Where you from?”

The young man says, “Oh, me? I’m from Canada, but I left because it’s just filled with hockey players and prost!tutes.”

The supervisor, crosses his arms and says, “Hey, my wife is from Canada!”

The young man responds, “Oh that’s wonderful… what team does she play for?”