Clean (old school) Joke: A guy goes into a bar, and starts to “dial numbers on his hand”, and talk into it

A guy walks into a bar and sits down.
He starts dialing numbers on his hand, like a telephone, and talking into his hand.

The bartender walks over and tells him this is a very tough neighborhood and he doesn’t need any trouble here.
The guy says, “You don’t understand. I’m very hi-tech. I had a phone installed in my hand because I was tired of carrying the cellular.”
The bartender says “Prove it.”
The guy dials up a number and hands his hand to the bartender.
The bartender talks into the hand and carries on a conversation.

“That’s incredible,” says the bartender. “I would never have believed it!”
“Yeah,” said the guy, “I can keep in touch with my broker, my wife, you name it. By the way, where is the men’s room?”
The bartender directs him to the men’s room.
The guy goes in and 5, 10, 20 minutes go by and he doesn’t return.

Fearing the worst given the neighborhood, the bartender goes into the men’s room.
There is the guy spread-eagle on the wall. His pants are pulled down and he has a roll of toilet paper up his butt.
“Oh my god!” said the bartender. “Did they rob you? Are you hurt?”
The guy turns and says:
“No, I’m ok. I’m just waiting for a fax.”

Related Posts

I covered a homeless man’s grocery bill, and the very next day, during my job interview, he greeted me as if I were the CEO

Emma’s life was at its breaking point. She was alone, grieving, and down to her last $50. On a rainy night, she gave up half of it…

I assumed my husband was covering our mortgage payments—until an eviction notice landed on my doorstep

Belle thinks her husband, Jeffrey, is paying the mortgage until an eviction notice shatters her world. Desperate for answers, she uncovers a gut-wrenching betrayal, including drained bank…

I Have to Raise Someone Elses Child While Her Mom Is Having Fun at Parties

I fell in love with a woman who was carrying another man’s child, and I promised to stand by her side no matter what. I never expected…

The Way You Sleep Reveals How Lazy You Are

You are NOT lazy! You’re a stubbornly independent, hardworking leader with a heart of pure gold and the fighting spirit of a warrior. You carry the weight…

I was unexpectedly let go from my job, and later uncovered that my husband’s mistress had orchestrated the entire scheme

As I walked down the corridor toward my boss’s office, my heart raced with anticipation. This is it, the moment all my hard work will finally be…

My Husband Demanded I Pay All Our Bills Because He Was ‘Saving up for Our Future’

It started with a strange request over dinner, one I couldn’t quite wrap my head around. However, the phone call that came days later is what really…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *